TOOK MOM.....

to dialysis today. they pulled too much fluid to fast and she cramped up real bad & threw a fit with 'em.

the puppies are driving bill crazy. HE"S driving strida folding bike  ME crazy. and mom's driving US crazy. He's had a headache for two days now and missed work. next week will be a short work check. He's a grump when he's got headaches. I question if i really want to live with a grumpy man the rest of my life. the morning started out bitchy. he got cross because i kept him awake with my snoring. i got testy back because he woke me up from a dead sleep to make me stop snoring. i hate waking to grumpy mornings. it makes the whole day sour.

the weather is gray, wet, cold and miserable. no riding for me this week. argh!!!!

I RODE WITH...

pete and john this morning to a man's house that is supposed to be wanting a couple of horses ground broke, but the guy stood us up. they were to do farrier work. i was to speak to him about working his horses. it makes me feel good that john recommended me to do the training. that tells me he has confindence in my ability to work with horses. it's just aggrevating to be stood up for work. pete wasted gas going out there only to have the guy be gone.

mama's about to make me crazy harping on how much weight she's lost & that i need to lose some weight. her comment this morning was that i'd lose weight once i get out and start working the horses again. she's right, but i don't need to hear it every day from her. & she's losing weight because of being on dialysis. if not for that, she hardware wouldn't be losing any either. arghh!

it's a pretty day. i think i'm gonna go do some ground work with jubilee. even if it is a little cold out there.

well, have a good day.

I RODE WITH...

pete and john this morning to a man's house that is supposed to be wanting a couple of horses ground broke, but the guy stood us up. they were to do farrier work. i was to speak to him about working his horses. it makes me feel good that john recommended me to do the training. that tells me he has confindence in my ability to work with horses. it's just aggrevating to be stood up for work. pete wasted gas going out there only to have the guy be gone.

mama's about to make me crazy harping on how much weight she's lost & that i need to lose some weight. her comment this morning was that i'd lose weight once i get out and start working the horses again. she's right, but i don't need to hear it every day from her. & she's losing weight because of being on dialysis. if not for that, she hardware wouldn't be losing any either. arghh!

it's a pretty day. i think i'm gonna go do some ground work with jubilee. even if it is a little cold out there.

well, have a good day.

I love mike i really do..
but god. promises after promises.and he doesnt even keep them
i seriously this people do not understand the concept of promising something.
what ever hes got alot of explaining to do...

arielle and i picked out our kids names

mine ---- Girls- Elizabeth Jane, Francesca LeeAnn, Rebecka Rose, Cecilia Anne
Boys- Nathaniel Austin, Daniel James,

so yeah

im going to be tho..

someday i'm gonna come back

around and you're not gonna be here anymore. thinking about it now, i'll be ok. it's not like you were here for me to begin with. you must have been so used to being able to tug on that string and have me come calling, wondering what i could do for you. what about me? sitting at the computer until 2:03am and chocolate chip cookies will never be able comfort me as you could. but i've grown up, and i don't need you anymore. sometimes i wonder if that's good or bad, but i don't need to be obsessed with someone who doesn't give me the time of day. i wish you had meant it when you said you loved me all of those times. i had so much faith in you. maybe that's where i went wrong, i expected far too much, i wanted things that you'd never be able to give, not even if you tried. you can keep talking about me, and you can keep lying to me if it helps you sleep at night...whatever you need darling. one day you'll realize what you lost, and you'll get down on your knees and beg. but i'll miss it, because...

someday you're gonna come back around and i'm not gonna be here anymore.